


Finally

by milo_g



Series: Canon!verse side stories [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Español | Spanish, and meets carla, carla is a latina mom kind of mom you cant change my mind, eremika if you squint, erens dead, link adentro, no betaed, ok no but spoilers of everything up to there, spoilers snk 136
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-17 17:20:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28603581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milo_g/pseuds/milo_g
Summary: It’s quiet, the way to death, the moments before. Nothing hurts. He feels a bit cold, but it’s fine, compared to all the heat he felt before, and his vision is a bit cloudy, but that doesn’t keep him from distinguishing Mikasa's shape, doing compressions on his chest and giving him artificial respiration.If he has any regrets, it’s probably that the only kiss they shared was like this, thanks to the CPR, but it’s not a regret in itself, because dying in Mikasa's arms is the most pleasant thing. He thought that it would not happen, that when he died, it would be by the hand of Levi, or even Zeke, but he always thought he would disappear. Either deep in the earth or in his head, but disappear at last. He thought that he would not rest and, honestly, he was okay with that.
Series: Canon!verse side stories [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2143743
Kudos: 25





	Finally

**Author's Note:**

> [Link en español ](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13788897/1/Al-fin)
> 
> Follow me on twitter
> 
> Enjoy.

It was necessary. That was his plan from the beginning, the chances of succeeding and not  _ dying  _ were few, so he didn’t worry.

It was nice. He was tired of the noise in his head, from his father, from Kruger, from previous users, all whispering in the back of his mind what to do, what not to do. Whom to save, whom to kill. Just... enough. Silence.

It’s quiet, the way to death, the moments before. Nothing hurts. He feels a bit cold, but it’s fine, compared to all the heat he felt before, and his vision is a bit cloudy, but that doesn’t keep him from distinguishing Mikasa's shape, doing compressions on his chest and giving him artificial respiration.

If he has any regrets, it’s probably that the only kiss they shared was like  _ this _ , thanks to the CPR, but it’s not a regret in itself, because dying in Mikasa's arms is the most pleasant thing. He thought that it would not happen, that when he died, it would be by the hand of Levi, or even Zeke, but he always thought he would disappear. Either deep in the earth or in his head, but disappear at last. He thought that he would not rest and, honestly, he was okay with that.

He doesn’t deserve to rest.

"We all deserve it." It's a soft voice, making his stomach tingle and knotting his throat. “We all need it,” she finishes.

That's when he notices that he no longer sees Mikasa, nor feels the compressions on his chest.

The sky is blue and the pristine white clouds moves fast. It reminds him of another time. He almost feels like it’s a déjà vu, but not because he wakes up in that place, but because he remembers having already dreamed of this moment.

Although now, he realizes that it hadn’t been a  _ dream. _

He sits up and rests his hands on the ground, feeling the grass caress his palms.

“Even you.”

He looks at the woman, his eyes wide and his lips ajar in astonishment, but then he frowns, looking away from her.

“I can’t rest. Someone has to take responsibility.”

"Someone already has," she says, and he scoffs.

"You have no  _ idea  _ all that happened." He folds his arms on his chest. “Everything went to hell–”

“ _ Language. _ ”

"Oh, come on, I'm dead."

"I didn't raise a rude child." She puts her arms on her hips, akimbo.

"Sure, you just raised a murderer," he grumbles.

"Eren."

He looks up reluctantly. Karla's expression is one of reprimand; her brow furrowed, the scowl at her mouth, but her eyes look hurt. Eren watches her in detail, as he had forgotten what she was like, in all those years. The memory of her death had always been clear, but with each passing day, her mother's face became blurred until it was completely crossed out, in sepia tones. However, Eren doesn’t doubt the very least that it’s her who is standing right there, scolding him.

"It's all over," she says, without changing her expression, but in a soft voice, "you don't have to pay for anything from anyone. You're  _ free _ .”

That sounds  _ so nice _ , but it also sounds pretty impossible.

"No one’s free," he answers. Karla growls. She takes a step towards him and reaches down to pick up a rock from the ground. Eren leaps to his feet and throws his hands up to cover himself. “I-I mean, I don't have the freedom to…”

_ To what? _

He doesn't know how to finish the sentence.

"And who is depriving you of that?" Karla asks when she sees his conflicted eyes. “What can't you do?”

"I'm here," he says, as if that explains all his problems.

"Would you rather be  _ there _ ?"

Well. No, actually.

"I don't understand what you want, Eren, but I do get that the only one who won't let you rest, or give you a break, is you. You were always like this, honey.”

"You say it's  _ my _ fault," he grunts again and crosses his arms.

She giggles, throwing the stone aside.

"I won't say things that  _ aren't true _ , but I'm not talking about that." She walks over to him and Eren notices that she barely reaches his shoulder. "I'm saying that it has been enough. Aren't you getting tired, son?”

Eren closes his eyes when she rests her hand on his face, and leans into the caress. His mother's hand is so warm.

"I'm  _ so  _ tired, Mom."

“Then  _ sleep. _ ”

He hugs her hips and rests his head on her stomach, like when he was little and fought with the other kids.

_ Finally _ , Eren thinks,  _ I'm home _ .

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> Follow me on twitter


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